Although retired now, looking and applying for work always felt harder than the actual work. As a hired gun programmer this could be an emotional roller coaster. Try to focus on the numbers. You put out X many pitches and you are going to get Y results. Just went through a long period of waiting on a project on the go at the moment (not programming) and then in one day all different parts and people seemed to come together like planets' alignment. Wising you all the best, Mate!